I really enjoy driving. Which is a good thing considering we bought a farm in Chilliwack while keeping everything else in Abbotsford.
I don’t love driving all the time. Late nights to pick up kids from youth, driving to Abbotsford for the fifth time in one day, early morning hours when the highway is jammed…these are all times when I wish teleportation was a real thing.
But on a sunny day, when time isn’t my enemy and children aren’t dictating my schedule, I love driving down an open road with the music on. I can choose where I want to go and what route I want to take. I can cruise the back roads, sightseeing along the way, with no one in the backseat to complain or interrupt my dreaming.
There is an actual word for this form of traveling—poddling. To poddle is to move or travel in a leisurely way. My dad is a confirmed poddler and has made an art of it, so I come by it honestly. My mom, on the other hand, is the Energizer bunny and always likes to be doing something. Poddling is not her style.
The Dreamer and The Doer
I realized very quickly into my relationship with Steve that I married the male version of my mom. Steve is a go-getter. When he’s in work mode, he has no time to waste. Even when he is relaxing, he is happiest when he has weeds to pull and gardens to tend. I poddle. He pulls weeds. It took many years of marriage for us to figure each other out.
I like to sleep in and stay up late. He wakes up before dawn and falls asleep the moment he sits still. The first time I remember this happening, we were entertaining guests and I looked over to see his head bobbing and weaving to his own personal lullaby. I was shocked. Twenty-five years later and I’m wishing he could bottle that ability and share some with me.
I’m a dreamer. Steve’s a doer. I like to think things over by talking them through. If I muse that the yard will feel more open if we dig out that hedge, I’ve no sooner said it than the shovel is out, and the dirt is flying. I’ve learned to dream carefully and communicate clearly, and he’s learned to put up with my ponderings and cool the jets.
Bringing a Little to the Table
At times, our opposing natures can be irritating. Steve wants to jump in with both feet while I’m still deciding if I even want to get wet. But time and experience has taught us that we both bring a little to the table that the other one needs. Steve might work himself into an early grave if it wasn’t for me slowing him down and forcing him to smell the roses. Without Steve, I’m pretty sure I’d never be in bed before midnight and stuck in a dreamer’s limbo, unable to make a decision, fearing that there might be something better around the corner.
We need each other. And I’m thankful for our differences.
He still hasn’t convinced me that 5:00 am is a reasonable time to start the day, but I appreciate his dedication to his family/farm and the way he faithfully and cheerfully gets up each day. I still haven’t convinced him that sitting with your feet up on a Saturday afternoon is time well spent, but he appreciates that it fills my bucket, refreshes my soul, and helps me to feel energized and ready to care for the needs of a busy family.
If I phone home on a Saturday afternoon, no one will answer my call. My dad will be poddling around the prairie and my mom will be working in the garden. Both are in their happy place. Both are glad that the other is in their happy place. No guilt. Just freedom to enjoy the things that bring them joy.
As we finish up the school year and head into the summer, I’m praying that we can leave some of the busyness behind. May we find time for the things that refuel us, slow us down, and bring us joy whether it’s poddling or pulling weeds.