{"id":729,"date":"2014-08-06T14:43:15","date_gmt":"2014-08-06T14:43:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/insideout.insidewp.test\/?p=729"},"modified":"2014-08-06T14:43:15","modified_gmt":"2014-08-06T14:43:15","slug":"pinterest-fail","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/abbotsfordchristian.com\/insideout\/2014\/08\/06\/pinterest-fail\/","title":{"rendered":"Me in the Kitchen? Fail."},"content":{"rendered":"

by Tanya Kieneker<\/h2>\n

I can’t cook.\u00a0Most people don’t know this about me.\u00a0Unless you are my husband.<\/p>\n

He has officially banned me from our kitchen, except of course to do the dishes. The reason is simple. I have flopped every meal known to man. I have burned every cookie, melted every spatula, loaded every soup with too much salt, and perhaps even thrown a mommy-tantrum while making Rice Krispie squares with my kids.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not even exaggerating. I actually lost it, completely, while trying to make the simplest recipe on earth. It was just far too stressful…stirring the marshmallows constantly, trying to scoop the gooey mess into the pan, coating everything completely before the marshmallow started to harden. All with a little four-year-old \u201ctrying\u201d to help, but just getting in my way. And so I did the most logical thing. I threw a tantrum…and was banned from the kitchen for eternity.<\/p>\n

And so, my husband has assumed all kitchen duties. He does all the cooking. I\u2019m not even allowed to grocery shop for fear I\u2019ll purchase something at too high of a price. (\u201cYou bought that cucumber for how much!!\u201d)<\/p>\n

I\u2019m a lot better at other things anyway. I can make a really awesome PowerPoint. That has to count for something right?<\/p>\n

I\u2019m sure I\u2019m a disappointment to every Pinterest-loving, Martha-Stewart-impersonating woman in North America.<\/span> <\/strong>When I look at some of the things in social media, that \u201csociety\u201d thinks I should do, make, or design, in order to be a hip and trendy mom, I get the giggles. Can you imagine me making one of these sandwiches for Jaydon?<\/p>\n

\"76f6ee17cc7d3896e5ef494339139257\"<\/p>\n

To be honest, first I giggle, because it\u2019s so absurd. And then I get mad. Some days I feel like I can barely get the kids to bed without losing my hair (truly it\u2019s a shock I don\u2019t have any grey hair yet with how well I handle stress). So why on earth should I feel guilty for not spending an hour cutting cute little shapes and animals out of my son\u2019s lunch?<\/p>\n

Or how about cupcakes\u2014the latest super-mommy trend? Apparently I should make totally adorable Minion cupcakes for Jaydon\u2019s next birthday. Like that\u2019s going to happen.<\/p>\n

If you Google \u201cPinterest fail\u201d you\u2019ll get hours of entertainment. Here\u2019s one of my favourites:<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

I\u2019m really not sure why we women do this to ourselves. We see something online that tells us what we\u2019re supposed to be like. And we fall for it. At least I do. And not only do I fall for it, but I start expecting it of other mom\u2019s and then judging them for not living up to it. (That\u2019s right. When I see your kid\u2019s school project, I\u2019m already doing a search online, in my head, for how to do it better. OK. I\u2019m not really. I promise.)<\/p>\n

Because of all this, I\u2019ve made a new commitment to myself. I\u2019m going to stop playing the game. I\u2019m going to get off the merry-go-round (they make me dizzy anyway) and think of myself differently. And let myself be OK with how God made me.<\/p>\n

Maybe I\u2019ll make Chris a flashy PowerPoint for all his favourite recipes.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

by Tanya Kieneker I can’t cook.\u00a0Most people don’t know this about me.\u00a0Unless you are my husband. He has officially banned me from our kitchen, except of course to do the dishes. The reason is simple. I have flopped every meal known to man. I have burned every cookie, melted every spatula, loaded every soup with […]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":739,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wds_primary_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[14],"tags":[],"post_folder":[],"class_list":["post-729","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-parents"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/abbotsfordchristian.com\/insideout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/729","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/abbotsfordchristian.com\/insideout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/abbotsfordchristian.com\/insideout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/abbotsfordchristian.com\/insideout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/abbotsfordchristian.com\/insideout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=729"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/abbotsfordchristian.com\/insideout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/729\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/abbotsfordchristian.com\/insideout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/739"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/abbotsfordchristian.com\/insideout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=729"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/abbotsfordchristian.com\/insideout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=729"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/abbotsfordchristian.com\/insideout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=729"},{"taxonomy":"post_folder","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/abbotsfordchristian.com\/insideout\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/post_folder?post=729"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}